Sleep Love Eat

Don’t fall for it!

Do any of you remember the old Nintendo game Paperboy? You were the newspaper boy, and your rode your bike down the street, and obstacles came out – increasingly faster and more frequently as the game went one – and you had to try to avoid them as you threw the newspapers to each doorstep. Ring a bell?

Anyway, that’s what I feel like it’s like being on Paleo sometimes. You’re on your Paleo path, trying to stay on the straight and narrow, riding smoothly and doing well when it’s just you on your own, but obstacles seem to come up all the time. Coworkers bring donuts right to your desk and wave the box under your nose… you go to your parents house for dinner and they’ve made pasta and garlic bread… you go to watch the game with some friends and they have a spread of pizza and beer… you go grocery shopping and have a hard time finding any grass-fed beef and fresh, local, organic products. It can be tough, especially for those newer to Paleo and still fighting those old cravings. Your personal will power may or may not be so great.

Which brings me to my point today.

Paleo Friends, I am trusting that by posting this article that you are going to READ this and FOLLOW MY INSTRUCTIONS, and not just look at the photo and think “oh, yay! free pastry day!” and run to your nearest Starbucks. I work hard here, for free, for your health, so the least that you can do is hear me out!

Grains are harmful to your health, but they’re also very addictive. Before going Paleo, you never thought you would be able to give them up. But you did. You weaned yourself, and you feel the benefits, and life is good. Really good. You know now that grains/sugars/dairy do your body much more harm than they do any ounce of goodness. They are the least nutritionally dense foods out there, highly processed in the making, and don’t let those little blueberries in those scones above try to tell you different! (But yes, blueberries on their own would be just fine.)

I noticed some online advertisements for Starbucks’ free pastry day today. Luckily, it ends mid-morning, so it’s not really an entire day, but I noticed they’re trying to lure you in with words like “free” and their mumbo-jumbo version of “goodness”:

  • No artificial flavors
  • No artificial dyes
  • No artificial trans fats
  • No high-fructose corn syrup

And while these things ARE good news, and they are so proud of what they are taking OUT, don’t forget that the grains & sugars that they are leaving IN makes these pastries inadvertently BAD NEWS. And who knows, maybe the good people at Starbucks just don’t know this yet. So I’m not hating on them, just trying to KEEP YOU FOCUSED. This is just a motivational post today… to keep you on the straight and narrow as best as you can… to keep you from having an insulin spike and blood sugar crash… and to keep your tummy happy and not bloated. We know life will have its moments, and that you may not be Paleo perfect 100% of the time, but I’d like to help you aim for 100% as best as I can.

So if you do happen to wander into a Starbucks, because a coworker wanted a coffee-break friend, or because maybe you just wanted a good old cup ‘o joe, stick to your Paleo ways. Get a Drip Coffee, an Americano, or even an Espresso if you’re feeling bold. Maybe try one of their new Tazo whole-leaf teas that are quite delicious. Whatever it be, don’t be a sucker for the free pastry. They will offer it to you at check-out, and look at you like your crazy when you deny it, but that’s okay because you know you’re making the healthiest choice you can for yourself. And you’ll feel so very proud. Maybe ask them when they’ll start making Coconut-Milk latte’s while you’re there :)

And if you do end up going to get a free pastry and are calling it your “open meal” for the week, please don’t tell me about it. My blood sugar rises at just the thought and I’m doing all I can to keep my diabetes under control! So, congratulations, in advance for sticking to your Paleo ways today :)

Oh – and I had to google it just to make sure I was right – click here to play Paperboy online! This is way more fun than eating pastries at Starbucks!

Happy eating :) Joey

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14 comments

  1. Shelley

    ha! love it.
    and love that you referenced Paperboy and included the link…you always did have a thing for video games!

  2. Melissa

    Hi Joey,

    I have been following your blog for the last month and really enjoy all your postings. I had to comment on this one today. I actually went to starbucks this morning for a much needed caffeine fix and they of course offered me a free pastry. The girls working were shocked I refused, twice. As if I would put that poison in my body! =P Thanks for the great post. I really love your girl’s blog. Keep up the great work!

  3. cancerguy99

    I’m not a huge fan of starbucks but I wish there were one near my office just so I could refuse the poison. Of course the bakery where I do get my coffe has much better pasteries but they aren’t free and easier to resist. Thanks for the post!!! And the paperboy link, that should kill an hour or two at the office today. ;)

    • It’s almost sad how strange people think it is to refuse these so-called “treats”! But, I don’t hate on the people who sell them, I really do think it’s a result of miseducation. I had no idea myself before we stumbled upon Paleo. It’s a good opportunity to spread the word. Yikes. That sounded religious.

  4. SK

    You know, it’s really not too hard if you’re prepared! I find that if I keep my desk well-stocked with Paleo goodies (the occasional bite of Larabar, turkey slices, handful of almonds, 75% dark chocolate) I am not tempted at all for this kind of stuff. And you are right, Joey, people really don’t notice what you eat as much as you think they do! Thanks for this post, I have been feeling more encouraged lately, and hope I can keep it up! I missed free pastry day, but guess what this afternoon is? Pizza and beer party at work. :/ None for me, thanks!

  5. Thanks Joey.
    I am a new Paleo follower (2 months now) and I go through this on an almost daily basis. You are right though…it is so much more satisfying feeling good!!!!!

    BTW–I LOVED that game!

    • Fantastic question & there are SO many reasons. Here are a few: 1. Our bodies were never intended to digest them, they’re completely inedible unless they are incredibly processed, so they cause us all kinds of gut irritation. 2. They convert almost immediately into glucose (yes, even “whole” grains), and cause your body to release large amounts of insulin to cover that glucose. Our bodies weren’t built to do this. 3. You can “live” off of grains, but not well. Leads to all kinds of syndrome x diseases such as diabetes, heart disease, etc. I could go on for days, but instead, I’ll send you here for some more fantastic information. Really eye-opening stuff. http://www.marksdailyapple.com/why-grains-are-unhealthy/

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